"Sunspot on the water, where the sky and oceans meet."



I give thanks to you and you and even you: Thanksgiving was really cool, I was feeling the whole family get together cheer. About a hundred people shacked up in a kitchen, felt like old times, the times when I was younger and without responsibility. Now life is spirally down to this bottomless pit of real world responsibility and heart break. Maybe not so much heart break? Side note: (A friend told me I was too young to sheer in the great bliss of heart break. Great bliss? Feels like knives cutting away at your soul 10 x fold man.) But I enjoyed listening to old stories of missing cows and goats, and the struggles made for the fine linen table we were so bless to eat on. Or a few of my nosey ass relatives... I think for the most part of all the family joy I missed my mother, her and I was real big on the holidays It was a favorite time of the year. Heh didn't even have to ask what to make on my plate, that's for sure. But if felt as if she was there... and that's what counts. So yeah? What's the deal with all the Mob movie marathons though? I'd leave, come back, Godfather, leave, come back, Goodfellas, leave again, come back, Casino? Who the hell said "Sicilian" mob flicks were great party favors to watch during thanksgiving? Whatever happened to good old Charlie Brown holiday films?

Well man, life is going and I'm not mad at all. I mean, I use to be very mad and I might even still be just a little upset but It wasn't like before. Hey, it's been only a few days, I can't change overnight. I'm just taking these small blows to the chest and standing tall after each one of them. That's all I can do, you know? Let school occupy my free time to hangtime. Kill some time with a few friends, board my troubles on someones concrete or just work til I can't think about anything or anyone...

To whom it concerns: So.... I guess, we tried you know? I don't blame you for the decision. If It was me, I'd do the same. Actually, I have done the same. I'd sacrificed others feelings and friendships for love so I can not be mad at all man. I just hope you never question your judgement again, can't loose the ones we love over petty unnecessary white lies. But I do appreciate the time you were there, your of-nothings conversations about you and you're life distracted me from my lifes woes and I liked that, I liked it a lot. Maybe in another life? We could be friends again.

Til another blog post