"Don't make me any promises.."

Never.

I'm still having these sleepless nights, heavy. Even when I think I just might fall asleep, it just doesn't happen. I believe my mind is immensely occupied with multiple things now, school, work and other current endeavours. So maybe I should start utilizing this blog more to free up some of the space in my mind? I just hope when school begins again that the sleep lost will ease off a bit. I don't want to fall so out of it that I can't keep up with my life, work or school.

For the most part, I'm feeling a little lighter and upbeat than normal. I feel I've reached that point in my life where I can regret nothing and just start looking forward to something, anything or any one for that matter. I don't know what God has planned for me but whatever it is I'm going to savour it, take it in slow and keep it. I can't help what goes on next and that (sort of) scares me because I want to take everything in so quickly but I know I should slow it down a bit. I'm older now and I have the time and patience to do whatever deems necessary now, well I mean.. I've always had a certain degree of patience. But this is so important to me now. I will not do anything careless to hurt or misplace anything I am trying to gain back right now. I can't even make mistakes inadvertently now. That's how serious this is for me.

I just think it's crazy, how life plays out. I never once considered my world to be flipped on it's axis. I guess to sum my feelings up now, I just want something that is genuine. I mean, I don't know what forever is, but if forever is happiness, I'll take the necessary steps in preserving that for the later date. But whatever I do from now on, no bullshit and no games. I'm real good without that immature shit in my life.

Heh, I was going to add on to this but I think this will do.